Day 31

So this is it, the end of the first month. If you'd asked me if I thought what I've done would have been possible a short month ago, I'd've scoffed. But here I am at the end and I'm so happy to have gotten this far. I hope I can begin to string togther more and more months of healthy living. I oftentimes doubt my abilities to fight off all the urges (and trust me there are many), but for now I just want to be happy with how I've done, and stay focused on getting through today and tomorrow.

Yesterday wasn't bad, though my weight stayed planted in my brain for almost the entire day. As I result, I believe that contributed to my not having dinner. Honestly (honestly) I wasn't even remotely hungry when I got home, and so I snacked on some rice cakes and didn't eat anything else. I didn't go to bed hungry at all, so I'm not going to beat myself up about this too much.

I ate well the rest of the day though. A shake in the morning, a Caesar salad for lunch (which I devoured), and a couple of tangerines and a serving of rice cakes. And lots of water...

So that was the day that was. Here now are the facts:

Day 30 food:

Shake (blueberries, non-fat vanilla yougurt, banana, splash of OJ, ice)
Water
Caesar salad with grilled chicken (entire order)
Water
Tangerine
Tangerine
Water
Quaker Quakes rice cakes (1 serving)
Water

Day 30 exercise: four long walks

Daily weight: 257 lbs. (down 30)


Today should be another easily regimented day. Work, then work, then home. Wish me luck on the final day of the first month of the rest of my life (I'm corny, right?).

Thanks for reading!

Day 30

Yesterday was a good day, though I had stuck in my brain the fact that I weighed in at two pounds heavier. I kept trying to tell myself not to think about it, but that's kind of like waking up, and saying "I'm not going to think of my ex-boyfriend, I'm not going to think of my ex-boyfriend," then realizing that by even saying that, I am thinking of him. Ugh.

But, the good thing is, I didn't use the way it made me feel to abuse myself. I ate a normal day's worth of food, got four walks in (an accomplishment because I worked three different jobs!), and kept in mind what my therapist has told me about keeping a positive outlook.

So, just the facts:

Day 29 food:

Shake (banana, blueberries, ice, non-fat vanilla yougurt, ice, OJ)
Water
Quaker Quakes rice cakes (1/2 serving)
Mexican chicken (small serving)
Water
Tangerine
Tangerine
Water
Mexican chicken (small serving)
Water

Day 29 exercise: Four walks

Daily weight: 257 lbs. (down 2)

So that's how the day shaped up. Today will probably be no different. Wish me luck!

Thanks for reading.

Day 29

Welcome to Week 5!

Yesterday was a good day, though I did break one of my main rules. I didn't break it too badly, though, so I'm not going to be too hard on myself.

I spept late (thus yesterday's post going up around 11:30 a.m., and skipped breakfast because I had to hustle to make it to pick a friend up and dive into the 'burbs for a show.

Once out there, we stopped at Chipotle, my favorite Mexican place, and I got the burrito bowl, again without cheese and sour cream, and again it was fantastic. I was full about half-way through the dish, so saved the rest for later.

I finished up the rest after the matinee we saw, and was basically full and figured I wouldn't need to eat the rest of the day.

But, I grocery shopped pretty late (8:30 p.m.) and decided to whip up a big bowl of Mexican chicken to have in the 'fridge for the week. While cooking, I ate a bit, mostly to make sure it was coming out okay, but... it was after 9:00 p.m. and I was eating... Oh well.

So, the facts:

Day 28 food:

Water
Burrito bowl (rice, chicken, peppers and onions, salsa, guacamole)
Unsweetened iced tea with splash of lemonade
Water
Quaker Quakes rice cakes (1 serving)
Baked pita chips with guacamole (4 chips)
Mexican chicken (about 4 mouthfuls of chicken, guac, peppers, salsa, onions, rice, little bit if cheese)
Water

Day 28 exercise: Three long walks

Daily weight: 258 lbs. (down 29)


So here we go into week 5. I'm thrilled to have gotten this far. Hopefully it's only just the beginning!

Thanks for reading!

Day 28

Even though I ate sort of sparingly last night, I still feel like I overate. And just like before I started this whole thing, food remains "on the brain" constantly. It's always there, sort of taunting me.

I'm in my head too much about this. Hopefully that will subside. Or, not. Perhaps I'm going to have to live with this for the rest of my life. Always wondering what the best choice is, desiring the wrong choice, then stopping myself and making the right decision anyway.

One thing that happened last night is, I knew the best choice for dinner (from Roman's), that is, I could have gotten the grilled chicken Caesar salad, but instead went for the California press wrap. It was more food, more fattening, and delicious. But it stuck in my mind as being "bad for me," while I was also at the same time repeating to myself that I shouldn't live life out of bounds.

Oh, well. It was a good day nevertheless.

So, the facts:

Day 27 food:

Shake (banana, blueberries, splash of OJ, ice, vanilla non-fat yougurt)
Water
Grilled chicken and wild rice (three small lumps of chicken, small portion of rice)
Water
Quaker Quakes rice cakes (1 serving)
Water
California press wrap (chicken, avacado, peppers, cheese)
Small salad
Water

Day 27 exercise: Three long walks (still haven't run...)

Daily weight: 256 lbs. (down 31)



So that's about it. Today's the last day of Week 4. Then onto Week 5. I think this is the longest I've made something like this work. I don't stop and pat myself on the back too much, but I think I'm doing pretty good. Yesterday was a sort of tough day mentally, but I need to stop and acknowledge myself and my successes.

Anyway, onward and upward. Thanks for reading!

Day 27

Yesterday wasn't the best day, but not necessarily for the reasons you might expect. I actually ate too little.

And it was odd. I never got hungry. I did snack throughout the day, but it wasn't the type of snacking I'm used to. It consisted of tangerines and those Quaker Quakes rice cakes. I also went to the movies and had a small popcorn. So while I'm fine with the amount of food I took in, I actually didn't have either a lunch or a dinner.

The decision to not eat wasn't a conscious one. After getting home from work at 1:00 p.m., I had to run to an appointment (I passed my written driving test!), and then decided to go to the movies. A couple of rice cakes here and there, a bucket of popcorn, and next thing I knew it was almost 9:00 p.m. and I didn't feel hungry nor did I want to make anything.

So, that's how it goes, I guess. I'm keeping a close watch of this behaviour to make sure it doesn't become a habit (or, oddly, an eating disorder), but for now, that's how it went down.

So, the facts:

Shake (blueberries, banana, vanilla no-fat yougurt, ice, splash of OJ)
Water
Quaker Quakes (about 2 servings)
Tangerine
Water
Popcorn (small from the Arclight)
Unsweetened iced tea w/splash of lemonade
Tangerine
Water

Day 27 exercise: Four long walks (didn't run... back is still a smidge wonky)

Daily weight: 257 lbs. (down 30)


So that's that. Today, a couple of hours of work, then a leisurely afternoon (maybe a run?), then poker tonight. I'm counting on pizza for dinner, or maybe we'll order from Roman's. We'll see...

Thanks for reading!

Day 26

Yesterday was a good day.

I didn't run, but thought about it. There is still the smallest of kinks in the right side of my lower back. Nothing painful, but just a little pull every now and then. I didn't want to aggrivate it unnecessarily.

Food-wise, I did good as well, and reversed an old habit as well. I think I wrote that I was going to skip having a shake yesterday morning, but ended up making one anyway. Through the course of my walk with the pup I got a few hunger pangs, and decided to answer them rather than try and soldier through without eating anything.

I had some leftover chicken for lunch, and then the rest of it for dinner. A couple of tangerines, a handful of rice cakes, and that was about it.

I made an effort to drink a bit more water, too, so that made me fell pretty good too.

The big thing that I overcame was this: Sometimes, pre-this whole change my life thing, I would show up for work and my very generous boss would offer to buy lunch for the two of us. In times past, even if I had already eaten lunch, I would accept his offer and have a second lunch. Yes, two lunches. And no, not like two salads. More like a Wendy's burger and fries meal, followed by a bacon-and-cheese omlette with home fries. Yesterday, when he offered, I at first contemplated having a salad (old habit's die hard, don't they?), then thought about getting the fruit salad (which would have been a fine choice, but a. I wasn't hungry, and b. I don't need to eat simply because it's offered to me).

So I resisted. I went to pick up his lunch, had a tangerine and some water, and made it through.

So that was my day. Now, the facts:

Day 25 food:

Shake (banana, blueberries, vanilla no-fat yougurt, ice, splash of OJ)
Water
Mexican chicken (chicken, rice, guacamole, peppers and onions, cheese)
Water
Tangerine
Tangerine
Mexican chicken (chicken, rice, guacamole, peppers and onions, cheese)
Water
Quaker quakes rice cakes (2 servings)

Day 25 exercise: Four long walks (!!)

Daily weight: 258 (down 29)


So that's about it. The new work schudule is good for my diet actually. No lingering around the house wondering if I'll eat or not. Feels pretty good.

Thank you for reading!

Day 25

So I think things are returning to normal, thankfully.

The back is just ever-so tender, but I'm pretty sure I will venture out and run again tomorrow (I only work a half-day so I can do it mid-afternoon at a leisurely pace). Also, my dear dog is (sorry for being graphic here) finally pooping like a normal dog. Phew. She still has to keep up wtih her antibiotics for five more days, but she's at least feeling worlds better.

Yesterday was a good day for me. I had a shake for breakfast, a can of soup for lunch (I'm sort of enjoying the soup at lunch thing), and made that same chicken thing that I made on Sunday again this evening, only this time I made it for a friend and I eat. It came out good, though this time I made my own guacamole, again I used cheese (remember: not going to live out-of-bounds), and this time I didn't eat almost the entire serving. There was even left-overs.

And, I managed to put the leftovers away without shoveling a couple of spoonfuls into my mouth while nobody was looking. I consider that an accomplishment.

The only down thing yesterday is, I don't think I drank as much water as I should have. I've got to keep a bottle of water on me at all times... That makes the difference.

So, just the facts:

Day 24 food:

Shake (blueberries, banana, strawberry yougurt, ice, splash of OJ)
Water
Chunky chicken and rice gumbo (entire can)
Water
Chicken dish (chicken, rice, green pepper, red pepper, onion, guacamole, cheese)
One beer (!! - I drank a beer, but lordy it was delicious - Newcastle Brown Ale)
Water

Day 24 exercise: Three long walks

Daily weight: 259 lbs. (down 28)


So today should be a fine day too. Going to see my therapist (we'll have much to talk about from this week), then work and work and home for some sort of dinner (t.b.d.).

Thank you for reading!

Day 24

So, I survived the messed up back and didn't lose it. I think it's about all gone, though everything (back shoulders etc.) all still feel a smidge tender. Like one wrong move and that's it, it'll go back to hurting. For for now it's feeling okay.

I ended up not eating dinner last night, which probably isn't good for me, but my poor sick pup needed to be brought to the vet and I didn't want to waste time after I got home from work. I thought if we got out early enough, I'd grab something (there's a Zankou Chicken right by the animal hospital), but we got out around 10:30 p.m., and I didn't want to eat that late.

Truth is, I never really got hungry, which is something completely new for me. On the drive home, I passed a McDonalds, a Jack-in-the-Box, and my favorite Mexican place, (along with a host of other places to binge), but resisted. I didn't resist the hunger, persay, I resisted the habit.

And imagine if I had cheated?? Lordy, this would be a completely different post, eh?

So, the facts:

Day 23 food:

Shake (banana, blueberries, strawberry yougurt, splash of OJ, juice)
Water
Chunky chicken and rice gumbo (entire can, 2 servings)
Water
Tangerine
Tangerine

Day 23 exercise: 3 long walks (still managed to get 'em off, bad back and all)

Daily weight: 261 (down 26)


So that's about everything. Now that I have a new job, it looks like very day will be structured. Shouldn't be that difficult to make it through another day.

Thanks for reading!

Day 23

Despite my back being all messed up yesterday, it turned out to be a good day, at least with regards to my overall health.

It really is amazing what a stiff back can do to my psyche. Even though I have basically eaten just fine the past two days, I still felt like everything I have been working towards was totally derailed. I felt fatter than I ever have, but, after weighing myself earlier, things are just fine.

I still have a bit of stiffness, but I think that another day of popping Advil will result in my waking up tomorrow all better. At least that's what I'm hoping.

Even with a stiff back, I did manage to get in three long walks with the pup, though not a foot longer than was necessary to make this claim. And my eating was pretty much perfect. Shake, salad, soup, with just a handful of those Quaker Quakes, and a tangerine to boot.

So, the facts:

Day 22 food:

Shake (banana, blueberries, splash of OJ, strawberry yougurt, ice)
Water
Grilled chicken Caesar salad (about 3/4 order)
Water
Tangerine
Chunky chicken and rice gumbo (2 servings, full can)
Water
Sip of orange juice
Quaker Quakes rice cakes (about 1 serving)

Day 22 exercise: Three walks

Daily weight: 263 lbs. (down 24)


So that's it. Today should go according to the book as well. At least that's the plan right now.

Thanks for reading!

Day 22

I am entering Week 4 feeling totally broken. I will keep up the fine habits I've adapted these past few weeks, but my back is hurting so much that I can barely stand it. I am tanked up on Advil and wishing I could just lay in bed for days on end eating and eating and eating and smoking and smoking and eating and smoking.

But!!! I've worked this hard for this long, I can't let a bum back get me de-railed. So, more Advil for me, and I will soldier on. Wish me luck!

Yesterday I ate this big chicken salsa guacamole vege mess, and ate it all day. I didn't quite finish off the entire thing, but I came pretty close. And I just picked at it all day, rather than have it as one set meal. I also, and this was sort of gross, ate a few mouthfuls of the beef and rice I was mixing up for the pup (who's still got the runs, poor dog). I also snacked on some of those rice cakes, and for the first half of the day forgot to drink water.

While it was a tough day, I think I survived. I could not weigh myself this morning, mostly because once I was dressed, I didn't want to undress. And no photographs. (I'm sure you're really missing them...)

And, obviously, no run. But I did manage to get in a few long walks (albeit slowly and crookedly).

So, the facts:

Day 21 food:

Grilled chicken in salsa with peppers onions guacamole and a little cheese (1/2 lb chicken tenders, full jar of salsa, half green pepper, half red pepper, half red onion, 1/2 cup grated cheddar cheese, about 5 tablespoons gaucamole)
Water
Quaker Quakes rice cake snacks (about 2 servings)

Day 22 exercise: Three walks, plus a few shorter ones

Daily weight: Didn't do it, too painful to undress...


So, I'm at work now, drinking water. I had a shake this morning, and will have a salad for lunch. Perhaps soup for dinner. I can't wait to get home and lay in bed. Ugh.

Thanks for reading.

Day 21

Yesterday was a good day, but so far today isn't that good of a day. Not specifically food-related, but that's part of it too. It's actually 7:00 p.m., so I'm getting to this very late in the day. I'm going to post a couple of pictures of me again tonight, but for a change of pace I'll post pictures of me clothes. You can check out my high fashion sense.

So, first yesterday. I woke up late, and made myself a shake, which was good. Took my vitamins, took the pup out a few times, even went for a run, and added a bit to what I've run prior. I also did some leg-stretching which I haven't done before, and I think that did something to my back. I started to stiffen up through the night, and by today was a full-blown mess.

For dinner last night, I got dinner from one of my favorite fast food joints, Chipotle, and did a little augmentation to what I normally get, and am pretty sure I managed to get something healthy.

Normally, I would get the burrito bowl, with rice, chicken, fajita mix (peppers and onions), extra salsa, sour cream, guacamole, and extra cheese. I cut out the sour cream and the cheese, and it was still quite delicious. So good, in fact, that I tried to recreate a similar dish today and it came out pretty good (though, in a fit of weakness, I added some cheese).

Anyway, yesterday was good. Today, I'm in pain. So, now the facts:

Day 20 food:

Shake (blueberries, banana, strawberry yougurt, ice, splash of OJ)
Water
Quaker Quakes rice cakes (1 serving)
Tangerine
Water
Burrito bowl (chicken, rice, fajita mix, salsa, guacamole)
Unsweetened tea with splash of lemonade
Water

Day 20 exercise: Three long walks plus a run (little over 1 mile)

Daily weight: 264 (down 23)


So, more on today tomorrow morning. Thanks for reading!

Day 20

Yesterday was a pretty good day. I sort of cheated later in the day, but I'm not beating myself up too much about it.

I didn't have breakfast, and had a few errands to run in the morning, followed by a job interview at noon. I figured I'd grab lunch after the interview (I was sort of looking forward to Baja Fresh). But, things took a turn for the different, and I went with the flow.

Halfway through the job interview (to become a personal assistant), the gentleman I was being interviewed by asked me if I wanted to simply get to work. Never one to pass up a challenge, I jumped in and started to get to work. I wasn't that hungry at the time, so I figured I could survive until 3:00 p.m.-ish and grab a late lunch.

Instead, his housekeeper cooked lunch for him, and they offered me something to eat too. It was delicious, and (I'm pretty sure) good for me. Sauteed shrimp, vegetables, and a small serving of rice. Delicious. I drank a bit of water throughout my work and took my vitamins.

After work, I had a snack. I bought these things called Quaker Quakes, caramel corn-flavored rice cakes. They're very tasty, low in calories, low in sugar, and fat-free. I had the equivilent of two servings.

Then a bit of water, got in another run, and went to the movies with a friend.

Which is where the cheat happened. I got a small popcorn and a small fruit punch. I ate all of the popcorn! It was soooo good, and not necessarily the worst thing for me, but I was eating it after 9:00 p.m. (about 10:15 p.m.). But I'm not going to beat myself up about it. I didn't get butter, and I didn't get nachos (as gooooood as they looked!).

So that was the day. Now, the facts:

Day 19 food:

Shrimp, veges and rice (8 shrimp, carrots zucchini and califlower, and about 1/2 cup rice)
Water
Rice cakes (2 servings)
Water
1/2 tangerine (it wasn't good!)
Chunky chicken sausage gumbo (full can)
Water
Small popcorn
Fruit punch

Day 19 exercise: Another run (just under 1 mile, three walks)

Daily weight: 263 lbs (down 24)


Not much to look forward to today. I'll probably make myself a shake now (12:30 p.m.), then have something for dinner later on. I'm supposed to be at a party tonight, and will probably have a cocktail, but will do my best to refrain from eating...

Thanks for reading!

Day 19

Yesterday wasn't bad at all.

I didn't have anything for breakfast, mostly because I woke up not hungry at all. I had therapy, then went straight to work. Had a couple of tangerines at work, then ordered the chicken Caesar salad for lunch. The chicken seemed undercooked, though, so I didn't eat very much of it at all.

A couple of tangerines mid-day, then home to shower and change, since I was going to the theater. The good news, though, is I managed to get a run in before showering. It hurt, but I did the same distance as the day before and I wasn't as breathless this time. I think I'll do the same distance a couple more times, then add a bit to keep pushing myself.

For dinner, I had a can of the Chunky soup. It was actually delicious (and so good to not have jambalaya!!).

So, the facts:

Day 18 food:

Tangerine
Water
Tangerine
Water
Grilled chicken Caesar salad (most of the lettuce, not much chicken)
Water
Tangerine
Tangerine
Water
Chicken and Sausage Gumbo with Rice (full can, 2 servings, 150 cal./serving)
Water

Day 18 exercise: Short run, plus three decent walks (hooray!)

Daily weight: 264 lbs. (down 23)


Today will be tricky, as will the entire weekend. All meals on my own. Wish me luck!

Thanks for reading.

Day 18

The good thing is, there is no more jambalaya to eat. The saga of the jambalaya in the house has come to an end (thankfully).

While I don't think it was the worst thing I could have been eating (no cream, no cheese), my ability to limit the amount I would eat at one time was severely diminished because it tasted so damn good. But, now it's over, and I can move on to salads and chicken dinners and soups.

So, yesterday was another up-and-down day.

The one small victory: I ran! ("I ran so far away...") Okay, no but really. I went for a very short run, but it was a run nevertheless. I was pretty breathless for most of it, but I did succeed in doing it. I will run again today when I get home from work. Hopefully it will go a bit easier.

I also signed up for NetFlix, and will try out a couple of different exercise DVD's. Not sure how that will go, but I'm going to give it a shot.

As for food, well, I started with a shake, then didn't eat anything until I had some jambalaya after the run. Then I ate three of the non-fat brownies. That wasn't good. I saw how quickly I could fall off of this, as they went down very easily. On the one hand, it's good that they were non-fat, but they tasted almost too good. And I should have had just one... But, like old times, I couldnt' stop myself. They were devoured before I could even realize what I was doing.

So, just the facts:

Day 17 food:

Shake (banana, blueberries, strawberry yougurt, ice, splash of OJ)
Water
Tangerine
Water
Tangerine
Jambalala (full order)
Non-fat brownie (3 of 'em...)
Water
Tangerine
Water

Day 17 exercise: Long walk, short run, long walk (not bad...)

Daily weight: 265 lbs. (down 22)


Today back to work, so a salad for lunch is in order, then soup for dinner is my plan.

Thanks for reading!

Day 17

Yesterday wasn't as much of a cake-walk as I had thought, but in the end wasn't the worst day either.

First order of business, though, is I need to get the jambalaya out of the house. It's almost too good, and whether or not it's actually not that bad for me, I keep eating way too much of it. So, today it's going. I don't care how.

That said, I skipped having a shake yesterday morning, and rather had a tangerine when I got to work. (I woke up not hungry at all.) Lunch was easy: the grilled chicken Caesar salad from the Brite Spot. Dinner became tricky because a good friend's mother was in town, and they wanted to have dinner.

Since I'm attempting to save money, I figured having them over here for dinner would be a smidge more cost-effective than eating out. So, I picked up salad and cornbread muffin tops from the supermarket, heated up a pot of jambalaya (surprise, surprise), and found this fat-free fudge brownie mix. Salad was good, I had a second helping of the jambalaya (ugh), and one brownie. The brownies were good, actually. I'm certain I would have loved them if I didn't know they were fat-free, but knowing they were fat-free, I only just liked them.

I also had a glass of wine. One glass. And, like a good drunky-drunk, was sloshed!! I passed out after they left and woke up at 3:30 a.m. So the pup didn't get her last walk of the night (nor did I get my last walk of the night!). I took her to the curb to go to the bathroom quickly, then went back to bed.

So this morning I did an extra-long walk, and I'm considering this morning's walk the third walk of yesterday, and will do three walks with her today.

Also, I think (I think, which means I'm not certain) that I'm ready to try and run. Nothing drastic. No marathon training, but just a nice easy jog around the neighborhood. Maybe this afternoon. We'll see...

So that was my day. Today I'm off from work, so choices, choices, choices...

Now, the facts:

Day 16 food:

Tangerine
Water
Grilled chicken Caesar salad (3/4 order)
Water
Tangerine
Water
Cornbread muffin top (3/4)
Jambalaya (double order!)
Salad (just a bit)
Water
Glass of white wine
Fat-free brownie

Day 16 exercise: Technically, not enough, but with this a.m.'s walk, enough

Daily weight: 266 (down 21)



Thanks for reading!

Day 16

Yesterday wasn't my best day, but mentally I have to simply move on and focus on today.

I woke up late, and made myself a shake at around 1:00 p.m. I had planned on having dinner around 7:30 p.m., but it turned out I wouldn't be eating until around 9:30 p.m., so I had leftover jambalaya around 5:30 p.m., and probably ate more than I should have. I didn't gorge myself, but in addition to a bowl, I had about six spoonfuls directly from the stockpot that was in the fridge. Ugh.

Dinner was okay health-wise, though delicious-tasting! I had prime rib, potatoes (roasted, but very oily), and spinach. I had a small slice of yougurt cake for dessert.

One tangerine during the day too, but that was about it. And I drank plenty of water.

So, the facts:

Day 15 food:

Shake (banana, blueberries, OJ, strawberry yougurt, ice)
Water
Tangerine
Jambalaya (a fairly large order total)
Water
Prime rib (one thin slice)
Potatoes (about seven pieces)
Spinach (quite a bit)
Yougurt lemon cake (one thin slice)
Water

Day 15 exercise: Not much at all. Ugh.

Daily weight: 265 lbs. (down 22) (a plateau?)


Back to work today, so should be pretty easy to get by.

Thanks for reading!

Day 15

So welcome to Week 3! I don't think this is the longest I've gone with any type of diet (I think I held onto to the heart-palpitation-causing diet Atkins for close to four weeks), but this is the longest I've eaten healthy on a regular basis that I can remember. While it's not necessarily the longest time, I am proud of what I've done thus far, and am doing my best to remain focused on today and tomorrow, not looking ahead weeks and months (though I do fantasize about what it will be like to be down to about 220 lbs.).

I made it through yesterday! That's the most important thing to reflect upon.

That said, there were some small pitfalls, one of which I fell into.

First off, I didn't snack while cooking. That was good. I did, though, eat a bowl of jambalala around 2:30 p.m. It wasn't much, but was necessary to make sure what I had just made didn't taste bad. (For the record, it tasted great!)

Then, once the party got going, I had a plate of jambalaya (still great!), with a small ladle of my friend's cheesy potatoes. I probably could have passed on the potatoes (I suspect they're not good for you...), but had in my mind that I don't want to live out-of-bounds. So long as I don't overstock my plate with it, I could eat some. So that's what I did.

The major pitfall that I fell into came when I let my dog out of her kennel after we were done eating. The little buffet we set up was at doggie nose-level, so I cleared everything to the kitchen. While in the kitchen, and out of view of everybody else, I took a spoonful of the cheesy potatoes. It happened without thought, and I'm lucky that I caught myself when I did, after one spoonful, because I could have easily devoured everything left in the tray. The first spoonful, though, happened subconsciously. My mind, and everything that I've been working towards, just turned off.

I'm glad that I caught myself when I did, but the big accomplishment was not smoking pot!! I did it. It was offered, and I turned it down. And everybody was very respectful of my decision to refrain, offering to not smoke in front of me. But by that time, I had already decided I would not do it, and told them to not do anything differently, I would just pass the pipe along to the next person. I did it!!

The other big thing that happened at the party was, I showed my January 1 pictures and my January 14 pictures to a couple of people to get some confirmation that my pictures look different, and they agreed. Like I said above, I am proud of what I've accomplished, and it felt good to show somebody the proof.

In other news, my tooth has stopped hurting. That's a smidge odd, though I'm happy about it. Rather than going to an emergency dentist this morning, I can wait and go to a dentist that a friend recommends instead.

So, the facts...

Day 14 food:

Banana
Water
Jambalaya (s small-ish bowl)
Water
Jambalaya (a bit more than the lunch portion)
Ladle of cheesy potatoes (not much!)
Spoonful of cheesy potatoes (ugh)
Sliver of guava cheesecake (I didn't like it! Though everybody else did...)
Orange juice
Water

Day 14 exercise: Not much, probably even less than the day before, but still three long walks)

Daily weight: 265 lbs. (down 22)


So today... I was feeling a bit yesterday like I was hitting a wall, but I will push through today and keep this going. I've got to! Not to sound too dramatical, but I feel like my life depends on this.

It's already 1:00 p.m. now, so I will probably simply jump stright to lunch (not sure what I'll have), and then have dinner at my friend Alex's place tonight (roast beef, potato, veges...).

Thanks for reading!

Day 14

So yesterday wasn't that bad, but I did find myself being tempted left and right. And tempted by many things.

I made a big fruity shake for breakfast, which was quite delicious. I have bananas now, so I tossed one of those into the shake, and it made it thicker and tastier. So that was good. I also took my multi-vitamin this morning, and I'm pretty sure I could feel the effects of that. It made me a smidge shaky, but I'm pretty sure my body will adjust to it.

I also had a tangerine that I bought the night before, and it wasn't as sweet as the ones I've been eating at work. I'm assuming they get sweeter the longer they sit around, so hopefully they'll get better.

I had a screener copy of "The Queen," so I made a bag of microwave popcorn to eat while watching it. The popcorn was pretty miserable, actually, too light, not as dense as movie popcorn, so I'll probably pass on eating it again.

Complicating things is, I've got a toothache. Back right bottom, one of my molars. It hurts! I've been tanked up on Advil for the past two days now. Ugh.

And for reasons that I won't name here, I had to spend the day yesterday and all of today with pot in the house. And, in all honestly, it's not been that difficult to avoid smoking it. Hopefully my willpower will carry into the party this evening.

And at poker last night, there was a lot of snacks everywhere. Doritos, mini-Oreos, pie, ice cream. Aughhh!!! I wanted a bowl-full of everything. But I resisted, and, as I had suspected, food was ordered from Roman's, so I got a salad. It was a bit short on dressing, but I guess that's good for me.

Anyway, that was the day yesterday. Here are the facts.

Day 13 food:

Shake (blueberries, banana, splash of OJ, yougurt, ice)
Water
Tangerine
Microwave popcorn (low-fat Orville Redenbacker, entire bag (2 servings))
Water
Caesar salad with grilled chicken (2/3 order)
Water

Day 13 exercise: About the same, though the 2nd walk of the day we did much longer than usual)

Daily weight: 265 lbs. (down 22)


So that's the day. Today I've got to whip up dinner for my co-workers coming over for dinner. My tendancy is to eat while I cook, so this is going to be a challenge. I'm a bit nervous about putting myself into that position, but I suspect I'll survive. And I'm going to make Jambalaya, which, while not 100% good for you, is definitely the lesser of many many evils.

Thanks for reading!